Monday, July 17, 2006


I had a pretty terrible fight with my mom. Well, actually my mom was angry and I didn't even open my mouth. Then I just ride on a motorcycle.
Initially I had nowhere to go. I just went arount the city, then an idea plopped on my mind and I decided to go to Parangtritis. Afterall, when I was upset, it was best not to meet any people I know, be completely alone and quiet. So I did.
That was the best decision I made all day. Along the way to the beach I finally saw the destructions of Jogja's Earthquake. It wasn't pretty. I was so thankful that I am okay and my family are okay. And it's good for a thought, too, after the horrible fight with my mom.
There were times on the road when I felt like giving up. It wasn't the safest road in the world, for I knew that there were people who would steal to survive. Besides, I didn't know the way, really, I just followed my instict to get there. I've been to the beach several times but I've never driven there, let alone by myself. Then came another argument that I'm a girl and it wasn't good to be on the beach alone, who knows what might happened?
Against all the good reason, I kept going and I reached the beach. It was like a dream. Before, I was in a city full of malls and shops and people, then I was on the road seeing the destruction caused by the nature, and then I was on the beach, seeing the beauty of the nature. When I touched the water I couldn't help but thinking if I was going to wake anytime soon. But I didn't. I enjoyed my time, walking on the beach, playing with the water and simply felt alive.
After spending about half an hour there I went back on the road. I felt hungry but I didn't dare picking up food and ate it home for it would only cause a bigger mess with my family. So I picked up food, and ate it here, in a warnet. Even now I'm not sure if my mom will talk to me. No, actually I'm sure she won't talk to me. Typical. Damn. This is suppossed to be my holiday!
Maybe, it's best to break down and cry anytime you feel like doing it. Well, I learned my lesson. If I did it back then when I felt like doing it, I wouldn't feel so miserable and heavy all these times that I wouldn't let small things upset me. It isn't right to blame my family because they don't know what was going on in my life, they don't know how I went through some things back then, they don't know how I deserve a rest, they only know the result of my work and it's good, so they think I went through all of that easily.
Well, I guess I'm not that strong a person afterall. I've tried to bear all the burdens by myself and I failed, it slapped me back in the end.
I'll go home now. Sorry you have to read this piece of shit, but I can't use my computer at home to write this (coz my family will find out for sure) and I just have to write this or I'll be even downer. Oh, and if you can, take a little time to pray for the victims of the earthquake. I think the food and money given to them are plenty enough (except for the area which hasn't been reached), now they need the strength inside to cope with the mental trauma, and God can help a lot with that.
See ya next time, I hope in a better day than today.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

So Damn Bored

It's a funny thing that I'm bored and tired in the same time. Well, at least today my training has ended.
I cancel my intention to post my writing because yesterday I read something that made me change my mind. But I'll post this instead. This is the list of birth-month, birthstones and the meaning, and the flower, in case someone wants to give a gift to someone else's birthday.

January - Garnet (Constancy) - Carnation, Snowdrop
February - Amethyst (Sincerity) - Violet, Primrose
March - Bloodstine, Aquamarine (Courage) - Jonquil, Baffodil
April - Diamond (Innocence) - Sweet Pea, Daisy
May - Emerald (Love, Success) - Lily of The Valley, Hawthorn
June - Pearl, Moonstone, Alexandrite (Health & Longevity) - Rose, Honeysuckle
July - Ruby (Contentment) - Larkspur, Water Lily
August - Sardonyx, Peridor (Marriage Happiness) - Poppy, Gladiolus
September - Sapphire (Clear Thinking) - Aster, Morning Glory
October - Opal, Taurmaline (Hope) - Calendula, Cosmos
November - Topaz (Fidelity) - Chysanthenum
December - Turquise, Zircon (Prosperity) - Narcisus, Holly

Hm... from this list, me and 22 are Health, Longevity, and Prosperity. Wow, that's the dream life! Hah hah hah.
By the way I did taste my first wine today. Before this I thought that wine is better than any other alcoholic drinks, but it seemed to me today that it's no different. I tasted three kinds of wine: sparkling wine, white wine, and red wine. So unless if they gave me the bad year or anything, I decided that I don't like wine. For now. Hm... I felt a little light-headed after drinking that much of wine. LOL. Figured. Alcohol and me? Not a good couple. But I will see if that can change, since I want to be a bartender so much more than anything. At least I do love coffee and tea. Good thing today we had a presentation from Starbucks, but no tea involved, such a shame.
Okay, gotta go. I'm bored as hell and I still have to pick money from ATM later. I forgot to do it earlier.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Long Time No See

Huh, not really long time, actually. Heh heh. I've just been busy these times. I climbed my second mountain this Monday, though not to the peak coz I did that only for the sake of my juniors. I climbed up and down only in half a day and got home at 11 pm, took a shower, writing something in my diary and went to sleep at about 1 am. The next day I had training for my program and had to get up at 5.30. Thanks to that I was half-asleep in two of the three sessions that day. I got home at 5 pm and stupid me, I slept until 6.30 pm, calling for some food delivery to celebrate my IP which was announced yesterday (not excellent, but better than the last time), and I couldn't sleep until 2.30 am!!!! No wonder I felt raher dizzy today, I only slept for about 3-4 hours last night. Sigh. Tomorrow is the last day of the training but the day after my friend wants to give me a treat (for her birthday) at SEVEN o'clock!!! That means I'll have to be ready to go at FIVE THIRTY!!! LOL!!! I'm busted. Sleeping is one of my favorite activities and I loooooove to sleep until noon... or even afternoon. I've ever woke up at 4 pm the next day. Hah hah hah.
Thank God the sessions today wasn't boring. It was kinda cool. About food and beverage. I learned many things, including which chemical was bad for the human's body, the chemicals which are banned from USA already but are still used a lot in Indonesia, the good and bad packaging, MANY THINGS!!!
What I look forward to, though, is tomorrow. Tomorrow I'll have my first WINE. Hah hah hah. Yea, tomorrow is my turn to try the 'food and wine combining'. Wonderful! Not to mention that there'll be a session on my two favorite beverages: coffee and tea. Hm-m. I certainly look forward to that!!!
Well, actually I wanted to post something here, but I forgot to bring it from home. Such a shame that I don't have internet connection home. But what the heck, I don't need it home. It's cheaper, easier this way, except when it was raining hard and I have to go to warnet to search for some information in order to do my assignment. Now, that's a torture - coz I only have my foot and the nearest warnet isn't so near anyway and it's down rather often... and when it's down it means that I'll have to walk even a longer distance. LOL. Torture, indeed. But it's great too, actually... that makes me thank God for my feet.
'Kay, that's about all for today. I hope tomorrow I can post my writing, or just browse the internet. And thanks for Haze to drop me a line, that's the only reason why I post something today .