Monday, May 21, 2007

The Future, Huh?

Perhaps writing completely about this idea of mine isn't the wisest thing to do. But my blog's visitor isn't that much, anyway. Lol. And I want to share my future dream. I'll use complicated terms, but all in all, I'm telling.
You've ever watched 'Ellen'? Yep, I decided that I will change my secret dream. The last time I wanted to be a crew on a cruise ship, and that hasn't changed, actually, except for the fact that I'd have to leave my family for that, and that's something I really need to think again, and again, and again. Opening a store like Ellen's (and by the way, the name of the shop is so brilliant I wanna use it, though I don't know if it's against the law or not). Doesn't matter, I will think about that later. For now I want to be happy that my future is rather clear for me. I will work or something to get the starting fund needed for my small-but-cozy store. I'll live there too, so I'll need to be prepared to buy all the furniture, etc. Maybe it can follow afterwards, but just in case. Well, I also want to improve my musical abilities so I'll need a piano in the least. Maybe I'll save to for a guitar lesson, or if it's possible... violin lesson too. Why I fell in love with guitar is rather obvious if you read my blog, but my dream instrument is violin. Has been since I was younger and never get to follow through. Well, who knows when finally I get the job of my dream I don't even have time for anything of that sort. I really envy those people who REALLY has talent in the subject they love most. I love music, I'd love to be able to write real good songs and live by it, no matter how hard it is. But I know that my talent in music is just so-so. Not very good, not very bad. I'm more than happy when people listen to my playing and they wanna learn playing the instrument, or those who don't play anymore decide to play again because they hear my playing... wow, that's the greatest compliment I've ever received! I'd love to be able to touch lives with my music, I'd love that the world would fall in love with my music, but sadly, I'm not good enough. Music can be my hobby, it can be something I can't live without, but unless something happens and I find out a new talent in me (lol) I will never be able to live by it.
Well, heh heh, the future. Hm. So unknown, so scary, but I'm also excited to know what's ahead.

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Beware, We're Everywhere

Yep. People should be careful in making friends, in admiring people, in liking people, and of course, they should be really really careful in falling in love, coz we're everywhere.
I've anticipated it. I've prepared for the worst, and it's not as bad as I anticipated, but it's still... not good. Gay or not, everybody must have been in the position where they feel like they don't belong where they are, like they are in the outside, looking in, where they feel like no one understands. Gay or not, everybody must have struggled with they fear of trusting other people with their secrets. So why is it so hard for people to understand what we went through? Why can't people just accept us as we are without trying to dig in as to what made us who we are? Does our past matter more than our future, than our here and now?
We are everywhere, gay people are everywhere. If you hate gays, really beware, coz they may be your leader, they may be your beloved friends, they may be your idols or role models or simply someone you admire, they may even be your loved ones or your crush or your lover. We are everywhere and you just can't tell unless we tell. So, really, beware.