Stupid Rantings

If loving you is to suffer
then by your side I will stay
until it reaches your heart someday
You are the light that has guided me down this road, never to lose my way again
Make me your shadow so that anywhere you may go
I'll be there to protect you and I'll be there to hold you
Baby can't you see I may not be the best there is
I can only offer you my heart
and a vow for never be apart
You are the life I've been searching on forever
Somewhere to rest my mind
And a place to call home

The first two lines of this lyric is a plagiat from other song (even though it's in Japanese so technically it's not a plagiat, rite?). Well, either way it's one of my favorite song by me. Heh heh. And I'm just feeling like bragging. Haha. Kidding. Nah, it's because I remember about my 2nd love today because of a coincidence. The girl's initial is DN. Today a guest came to my station and she asked me for some help considering a gift to her client. She was pretty and she looked a bit like DN, so I noticed her right away. Then I asked her for her name, and damn, believe it or not her name was D. Later on, I asked her to whom the gift was given. The answer is to a woman named N. I couldn't help but grinning like an idiot the rest of the day. Well, it's more like a bittersweet smile than a grin, but I felt a little bit giddy from that coincidence. Part of what made me so much in love with DN in the past was the intriguing connection between us. We got sick at the same time (it wasn't flu season), there was a blackout the moment she walked into the room where I was, I talked to her in my mind and she actually did what I said (it was freaky to me, actually), heck, I met her on the first day of the turning point in my life! I'm a very romantic person, and honestly, all those coincidences would be great for a book or a movie. It felt like she was destined to be mine. Alas that's not the case. Life's not that easy, huh?

When I wrote the first verse of this song, she was the one who popped up in my head. I knew if I were a man, I'd have been the perfect man for her. I loved her first. I watched closely as she grew from a worm into a butterfly, but I'm the one who was in love with her when she was still a worm.

I'm still not giving up. I still believe in a happy ever after, I still believe in a love that lasts forever. I still want this: http://ryanverse.blogspot.com/2007/04/what-makes-family-family.html, as much as I wanted it two years ago. The only difference is that I used to say that I Want To Be In Love... now I know that I need a Fearless Love. Hihihi :D